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Almost 13 months old - September 14, 2015

Almost 13 months old – September 14, 2015

AUGUST 21 – SEPTEMBER 21 (2015)


  • 1st birthday! (8/21)
  • 1st time clapping hands together (8/26)
  • 1st time saying “car” (8/26)
  • 1st time stepping up a curb (legs only) (8/30)
  • 1st time stepping down a curb (legs only) (9/2)
  • 1st “play date” (9/8)
  • 1st birthday party (9/13)
  • 1st & 2nd full days with Eric while I worked (9/19 & 9/20)

1st birthday party - September 13, 2015

1st birthday party – September 13, 2015


  • car (sounds like “gah”)
  • he says car for real cars, toy cars, cars in books and on TV
  • ball (sounds like “bah”)
  • he says ball for real balls, balls in books and on TV
1st full day with dada - September 19, 2015

1st full day with dada – September 19, 2015


  • new sounds:  “um bucka bucka”/”a buckum buckum”
  • he makes a “nam” sound when it’s time to eat
  • he directly addressed one of the kids (“Emil”) we’d just met at the park by name (8/30)
  • he might have said his name (9/5)
  • he might have said “I love you” (he said to both Eric & I separately)
  • he knows what “pillow blanket” means and will look for it (same goes for balls)


  • “clap your hands” (no gestural cues) (9/1)
  • “stomp your feet” (9/2)
  • “high five” (9/3)
  • “brush my hair” (9/7)
  • “take your bib off” (he also does on his own) (9/10)
  • “skinny cat” (which means raise arms to help having shirt removed)
  • “throw it” (either a ball or something “yucky” that he picks up outside)
  • “down dog” (9/15)
  • “where’s your ball/pillow blanket?” (he’ll go looking)


  • he walked backward repeatedly with his Little Tikes car (8/25)
  • he stepped over the couch armrest (from the coffee table) using just his legs (8/31)
  • he steps up & down curbs (with & without help)
  • sitting on his Little Tikes car, he “drove” it forward with feet by leaning way forward (9/10)
  • he climbed into a kitchen cupboard (9/16)
  • possible right hand dominance (i.e. when eating)
  • he started doing “down dog” yoga pose before I realized that’s what he was doing (he sees me doing it regularly)
  • he doesn’t just walk, he runs!
  • he trips less frequently
  • he rarely hits his head when falling backward because his abdominal strength is so good
Climbing into a cupboard - September 16, 2015

Climbing into a cupboard – September 16, 2015


  • “dancing”
  • making us laugh doing his funny “shaky thing”
  • throwing/bouncing balls
  • making “baskets” in the basketball hoop & Pack ‘n Play
  • driving his little cars across the floor (or walls)
  • turning pages of books
  • he laughs hysterically while chasing & being chased, then falls into pillows
  • I cut 1 panel out of a Pack ‘n Play to make him a “fort”
  • putting blocks in container & trying to close lid (9/8)
  • play date with Piper (9/8)
  • watching Sesame Street, Mister Rogers
  • he gets very interested in music documentaries (stops to listen and/or dance)
  • 1st birthday party (9/13)


  • outdoor “roaming” the yard
  • running down the sidewalk (9/9)
  • visiting & petting the neighbor’s dogs
  • 1st mud puddle (9/17)
  • rides in the stroller (walking, rollerblading)
  • hot tub “swim”
  • sitting on the skateboard for rides with Eric

Petting the neighbor's dogs - September 9, 2015

Petting the neighbor’s dogs – September 9, 2015


  • playing at Imagine Children’s Museum for his birthday (8/21)
  • looking at the animals at Petco (9/2)
  • hiking (with Ergo carrier) at the Pilchuck Tree Farm (9/5)
  • dining at The Shire Cafe (9/5)
  • “Touch A Truck” (9/12)
  • we started Kindermusik (9/15)
  • he loves shopping cart rides at stores
Touch A Truck - September 12, 2015

Touch A Truck – September 12, 2015


  • he had a runny nose and sneezing that lasted ~2 days (8/24-25)
  • 12 month pediatrician visit (8/25)
  • Weight = 19 lbs at 12 months
  • he got his MMR & Hep A vaccines, but I declined the chickenpox vaccine (9/2)
New clothes from Todd's Great Aunt - August 22, 2015

New clothes from Todd’s Great Aunt – August 22, 2015


  • he kept handing his spoon back to me after taking bites (instead of resisting letting go like usual) (8/23)
  • he started gnawing on crib rails (so I covered them!)
  • he has a strong tendency for “chewing” (i.e. he’s destructive to board books)
  • we try to brush his teeth daily but it can be almost impossible!
BBQ tempeh - August 30, 2015

BBQ tempeh – August 30, 2015


  • he put his pillow blanket in the kitchen drawer, then closed the drawer (and repeated it) (9/1)
  • he sometimes claps for himself (9/4)
  • he tried to put the dish towel back on fridge, and tried to pull open fridge door (9/14)
  • he tries to put rose petals back, after he pulls them off

Hiking at the Pilchuck Tree Farm - September 5, 2015

Hiking at the Pilchuck Tree Farm – September 5, 2015


  • he protests when he can’t have something
  • increasingly distracted sitting in my glider chair in the morning and before naps
  • he resists being picked up by raising arms and arching head and body waaaay back
He carried that step stool up there all by himself - September 17, 2015

He carried that step stool up there all by himself – September 17, 2015


  • initially his organic soy formula was mixed with a little hemp milk (3:1 ratio)
  • homemade cashew rice milk was added in (9/2)
  • I started making cashew oat milk instead of cashew rice milk
  • at month’s end he gets a blend of (equal parts):  formula, hemp milk, cashew oat milk and soy milk
  • at month’s end we’re half way through formula can #71
  • he had ~2.5 cans of formula this month which is half as much as last month
Green Sprouts sippy & "pillow blanket" & Seahawks fuzzy slippers - September 14, 2015

Green Sprouts sippy & “pillow blanket” & Seahawks fuzzy slippers – September 14, 2015


  • best sleep month to date!
  • he woke up at night only twice (one was a “rough” night because he stayed awake/restless from 1:30 – 3:30 AM)
  • 1x he woke up at 4:30 AM so I had him sleep in my bed with me for another hour before we got up
  • fell asleep on floor 45 min before bed (9/9)
  • shortest nap:  30 minutes
  • longest nap:  2.75 hours
  • average nap:  1.75 hours
  • wears size 18 month sleepers
Asleep on the floor - September 9, 2015

Asleep on the floor – September 9, 2015


  • more solid food = more poop!
  • he poops about twice per day
  • 33 poops were done on the toilet
  • 32 poops were “misses”
  • while sitting on the toilet, he reaches as far down into the toilet as he can
  • increasingly resists staying on the toilet seat (twists to get off)
Outside roaming - September 8, 2015

Outside roaming – September 8, 2015

All for now!

One year old - August 21, 2015

One year old – August 21, 2015

~9:30 PM on August 21, 2015

Usually my posts are so long and detailed that they take days to compose.  Right now, I’m attempting to get this done tonight.  The picture above was taken just a short while ago.  In the moments before I took it, I felt the same heart swell that I feel at least 1000 times every single day.  I love Todd so much that it makes me get a little teary at various moments all the time.

When I look back on my life before Todd, I know that it was really, really good, but I can’t help but look at the “before Todd” pictures and see that HE wasn’t there.  I see a certain emptiness.  It’s so weird and so wonderful.  And scary, too:  I don’t know how I would go on if something bad happened to him.  But I can’t think about that…

Actually the purpose of this post is to talk about today.  Today was Todd’s first birthday.  It was a great day.  I knew it was coming.  I’ve thought about it a lot.  But even I was surprised at how emotional I felt today.  It was a happy teary kind of day.

The day started when Eric surprised me with a thoughtful card.  Todd and I had a fun morning in the house, then after his nap I took him to the Imagine Children’s Museum (Everett, WA) for the first time.  Eric was able to join us there, and then we went out to dinner.  Back home, there was the usual evening rowdiness followed by my wild, active toddler turning, like putty in my arms, into my sleepy, cuddly baby.

When I look at Todd and I feel so much love, I know that it’s because he’s made from us.  Not like, “he’s our son so of course we love him,” but somehow it feels like much more than that.  Todd is the product of a LOT of love that Eric and I have for each other.  And I do believe that higher powers were at work in creating him, too…

Now– this might seem like an out-of-place time to say this, but it’s only true:

Todd’s Birth Day was THE worst day of my life.

I felt that way from Day 1.  Is that shocking?  It feels very shocking to me.  But it’s the truth, and it’s something that I live with every day to some degree or another.  I first mentioned it when I wrote up the post about Todd’s Birth Day (it’s at the very end), and I bullet-point listed the reasons why.  At the time, I was almost 1 month post-partum, and I honestly figured that the feeling would be temporary.  I mentioned closure in that post, but now I doubt if I’ll ever get full closure.

But– today I did have one epiphany that gave me a small degree of that closure.  What I realized today was that the overwhelming, almost painful love that I feel for Todd MUST BE THE SAME THING as “that” feeling– the euphoria, the adrenalin rush, the birth “high”– that I wanted but I absolutely did not feel at the time of Todd’s birth.  (Recall that all I was capable of feeling was relief.  I was 100% physically depleted.)

I’ve been looking forward to this day for a long time.  I knew that Todd’s birthday would be so much better than his birth day!  But like I said at the beginning, I wasn’t prepared for how emotional I’d feel.

So I’d like to take a moment to rejoice in all the ways that today brought me pleasures and joys that Todd’s birth day did not:

  • On Todd’s birth day, I endured tremendous physical pain and exhaustion.
    Today there was none of that!
  • On Todd’s birth day, I didn’t have him until late in the day.
    Today I had him with me all day!
  • On Todd’s birth day, I only got to hold him for a few minutes.
    Today I held him, hugged him, and loved him all day!
  • On Todd’s birth day, Eric, Todd and I didn’t have any family bonding time.
    Today we had plenty of bonding time!
  • On Todd’s birth day, my niece Ashley (who was with me during labor) wasn’t able to see him at all.
    Today she saw him via video chat!
  • On Todd’s birth day, I had to go to the hospital, and I felt like a failure.
    Today, I was in the vicinity of the hospital, and I actually haven’t felt like a failure in a long time!


  • On Todd’s birth day, I didn’t feel euphoria.
    Today I felt it!  Every day, I feel it when I’m with Todd.

Todd’s birth day WAS the worst day of my life.  However– every one of the ~365 days that he’s been in my life since have been the BEST days of my life.

Here are a few more pictures from today:

Morning bottle

Morning bottle

Elisa & Todd

Elisa & Todd

At the Children's Museum

At the Children’s Museum

Well it seems that it’s just a wee past midnight now, so it’s actually August 22nd now.  But I did fulfill my goal.  So, GOOD night!


"There are those who are appalled because I am so vocal about injustice, yet I am equally appalled by their silence." Lujene Clark

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